Tuesday Night Soup

Let me tell you a story about a soup that was a disaster but then wasn’t.

I dutifully soaked the beans overnight, thawed buttermilk from the freezer, got onions in the pot as soon as we got home.  An hour later and those beans were still hard, the crispy onions were maybe just a tad bit past crispy, the thyme we subbed for mint was making our entire kitchen smell like dirt.  This dinner had all the makings of an episode of deep disappointment for me.

I read these recipes beforehand, I spend money on the ingredients, I envision myself cooking them, eating them, loving them.  When reality doesn’t live up to my expectations, it can throw me for a real loop and my reactions are not healthy or helpful.  Like eating one bad meal or worse, throwing away one bad meal and having to resort to a Plan B that I never even considered existing, could ruin my life?

img_3441

So imagine my shock when I was so chill about that soup.  The beans were NOT “creamy,” the onions maybe tasted a little bit charred, that thyme oil was gross and went down the drain.  And guess what?  The soup was still really good!!!  How?!  Maybe my lax attitude willed it into deliciousness?  Let’s not question these things.

Wouldn’t it be nice if this was a Lesson Learned Moment and I’m now imperceptible to cooking failure disappointment?  I’d like to pretend it is, but I know it isn’t.  I’ll still watch 50 videos on how to make pasta then feel like a failure if I don’t do it to perfection.  I’ll still be upset if I buy an expensive cut of meat and overcook it.  I’ll still be sad if my pancakes stick to the pan and I have to eat toast instead.  But maybe just one less instance here and there is progress.

Recipe: Beans and Green Soup with Salted Yogurt and Sizzled Mint

Weekend Things

Life is weird right now and I’m having a tough time deciphering everything I’m feeling.  Well, I have a tough time doing that anyway, but right now, it feels extra tough.  One moment, I feel inexplicably happy, then guilty about feeling happy.  Charged, motivated, invigorated, then crippling helplessness.  The good news, is you’re here with me, right?  You feel it too?

Let’s keep on keeping on.  Let’s go to dinner with friends and listen to wedding plans.  Let’s watch documentaries and talk about big things with passion and conviction and understanding when someone else might feel differently.  Let’s sleep and give ourselves time to feel relaxed, rejuvenated and reconnected with the people around us.  Let’s be productive, but let’s also slow down and breathe.  Let’s put down our devices, eat dinner NOT in front of the TV.  Let’s see movies with narratives that challenge us to think past our own lives.  Let’s laugh and feel thankful for the small things then let’s try new things and feel thankful for the opportunity to do that too.  I did all of this this weekend.  Like I said, gotta keep on keeping on.

img_5084

Halibut Foil Packs with Chile Butter (‘cept with cod) // Fences was so good and Viola Davis is a goddess // Sunday Breakfast with Babettes and Boxcar at The Source // Brewing a saison with FUGGLE hops!