Author: Lauren

I'm Lauren and this is my life.

The Aftermath

LaurenLeave a comment

Last night, before drifting off to sleep, I repeated the words “President Trump, President Trump,” hoping that if I kept saying it, it would start to feel real and acceptable.  It didn’t work.

In the past 36 hours, I have felt many things.  Anger, disappointment, numbness, but most of all, I have felt sad and scared.  Driving home on Tuesday, I told Joey that I had not even considered the possibility of Hillary not winning and that I maybe should have so I wouldn’t feel completely blindsided in the event of defeat.  But even after that, I didn’t actually believe it could happen.

I couldn’t write this yesterday.  It was all too real and raw.  Simply put, I was inconsolable. So even though I went to work and put on my best face, inside — and at times, outside, because let’s be real, I did not make it through that concession speech without tears —  I was heartbroken.  For Hillary, who spent her entire life working towards this and for myself and the millions who felt she was our candidate, our champion, our answer to the glass ceiling.

I’m trying not to take it personally, but it feels so personal.  Joey, being the world’s biggest optimist, keeps trying to tell me that people were so hell bent on having a president that wasn’t “part of the system” that they were willing to overlook all the heinous things that have been said and done by Trump.  You will never convince me of this.  You will never make me understand it.

For eight years, I have so easily been able to point to President Obama as the epitome of grace, class, kindness and intelligence.  Whether or not you agree with his politics, who he is as a person, is undeniable.  I’m so sad that we are following up his presidency with this.  With someone who seems to have brought out the worst things that exist in this country.  This is bigger than just the exchange of power.  It’s more than being upset that “my team” didn’t win.

I am doing my best to be hopeful.  Honestly, I am.  The unknown frightens me like no other and it is all too easy to jump to (hopefully) far off extremes, but I’m taking solace in the fact that I’m not alone in feeling this way.  Not by a long shot.  I read and heard and saw so many things yesterday — including the words of my parents, who I had dinner with last night and feel semi-healed from — that made me know how wide-spread this feeling is.

I heard somewhere that it takes the brain three days to adapt when the world gets turned upside down.  I’m hoping it’s true and that’s as long as it takes.

Weekend Things

LaurenLeave a comment

This morning, I woke up BEFORE my alarm and it WASN’T pitch dark (the best part about daylight saving time ending!).  And as I got ready, I thought back over the weekend.  I remembered how I ordered chicken liver mousse on Friday and quickly realized I am NOT a chicken liver mousse person.  How we tried a new-to-us restaurant on Saturday and were sorely disappointed in the experience.  How the movie we saw was just okay and how I chipped my brand new manicure by washing the dishes on Sunday.

And while that might sound like a series of disappointments, I thought our weekend was PERFECT.  Because the things that first come to mind aren’t soggy pizza or how I forgot to pick up my contacts AGAIN.  Instead, I’m thinking about being blown away by Amos Lee’s voice, and waking up to Joey making me pancakes on Saturday and the most perfect running weather, and getting to order a beer and settle into our seats at the Mayan early enough to laugh at every one tripping on the exact same stair (WHY??).  Plus Sunday breakfast sandwiches and the reason I had to wash so many dishes?  Because I got to spend the entire day in my kitchen ♥

img_4526img_4525

We saw Amos Lee at The Buell on Friday night and WHOA, his voice.  I was watching it come out of his mouth and I still couldn’t believe it!  And not only can he sing, but he interacts with the crowd so naturally.  He encoured THREE times!  P.S. I was very into the 4- sister band that opened for him.  They’re called SHEL and they really rocked it.  Oh and I teased this picture of our dinner at The Nickel before the concert, and even though it looks like something that was burnt to a crisp, it was actually a charcoal-encrusted poblano, stuffed with mashed sweet potato and it was maybe one of the best things I’ve eaten this year.

img_4528moonlight-1

Saturday was so plan-less and perfect.  I went on a nice long run before walking myself to Base Coat for a mani/pedi.  I went the dark red route, even though Joey tried to tell me it wasn’t close enough to the holidays for red manicures.  What does he know 😛  My thoughts on Moonlight are complicated.  On the one hand, it was so powerful and heartbreaking, on the other, it was slow and lacking resolve.  But still, I’m my happiest self once I step into the Mayan.

img_4516img_4523

Sunday breakfast at Port Side, where breakfast sandwiches were enjoyed and Pumpkin Spice Lattes were sipped.  Afterwards, Joey headed out and I headed to the store before doing that new Sunday routine of prepping lunches and such for the week.  Also, I spent a good couple of hours making the chicken/broth for this Lemony Chicken and Rice Soup that we finished and ate for dinner.  Bon Appétit recipes can be a little complicated sometimes but if you have the time and patience, they can also teach you new techniques, like tempering eggs.  Result: a soup that was too velvety to be true!

Happy Monday!