Balance

Whoa, I just almost wrote this post through my old blog site.  Oopsie.

Anyways. I’ve just come to a very serious realization.  An epiphany, if you will.

All this time I’ve thought working out made me feel good, but it’s really just wearing comfy workout clothes that makes me feel good!  Okay in all seriousness, I do have something that I’ve been thinking about and finally just decided I should write about it.

I’m very aware that I’m the kind of person who gets stressed out extremely easily.  I don’t know where I get this from or if I’ve always been this way, but the smallest things can stress me out.  This includes TV shows piling up in my DVR, my jeans being an inch shorter than I want them to be and my food not being hot enough.  Stupid small things.

The result is that my skin freaks out, my dreams get all sorts of weird and I’m just in a bad mood.  So I cut back.  Cut back on a lot of the things I used to fill my days with.  Cooking, running, blogging, cleaning.  Just kidding about that last one though.  This doesn’t mean I stopped liking these things, I was just exhausted trying to fit them all in everyday.  These days, I only do those things a few times a week, as opposed to 5-6 days a week and it’s made my life so much simpler.  The trade-off, though, is that they’re harder.

I used to be a one post a day kind of blogger.  As soon as I graduated college and traded in a job where I could blog while I was working for a grown up 8-5 one, that became an unrealistic blogging schedule.  So I cut back.  And if you hadn’t noticed, lately I’m lucky to get one to two posts up a week.

I realized that while I love writing, taking time out of my too-short-as-it-is weeknight to sit behind a computer screen wasn’t what I wanted to be doing.  Especially when sudden invitations to burger night or catching up on episodes of Dexter and Revenge are much more fun.  The trade off is that I feel a lot less connected to this blog and my blogging voice in general.

Does that make sense?  I’m here so infrequently that it’s become a random jumble of weekly happenings.  Part of me is just fine with this.  It’s easier and I have a lot more to share.  But the other half of me hates struggling to put my thoughts together in a clear and organized way when I do write a post.  I no longer feel like I’m sitting down to tell a friend about my day.  Instead I feel uncertain of the things I write and like I’m losing my voice as a writer.  Like with anything, practice makes perfect and cutting back on practice makes less perfect.

When I started this new blog, it was because I wanted to move on from having one focus and because I was having some doubts about the community that I had targeted with the things I was writing about.  I wanted to be honest about the not-so-perfect, not-so-easy, not-so-one-dimensional parts of my life, and I feel that I haven’t done much of that.  I guess I’m just struggling to balance my need to have simplicity in my life with my desire to keep evolving as a writer.

Running and cooking are a whole different conversation.

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Why do you blog?

Do you ever have a hard time finding your writer’s voice?

Any and all feedback is welcome!

 

10 thoughts on “Balance

  1. I’m really enjoying this new blog Lauren — it feels very authentic. And I’d rather see posts a couple times a week than forced posts daily.

    Oh and I too get stressed at an overflowing DVR, too short pants, and not hot enough food!

    • Thanks so much, Shanna. That means a lot to me! Authenticity is important to me, so it’s good to hear that I’m coming across that way.

      Ironically, burning my mouth on food that is too hot also stresses me out 🙂

  2. I love your blog regardless of the quantity that you post a week. I always look forward to your posts because I know they are true and fun. As stated in today’s post I basically use my blog as a journal of sorts. I know not everyone will want to read about what I am specifically talking about on any given day, but it is my thoughts/blog/decision. And I am ok with that!!

    • I loved that post of yours! It was a great reminder that ultimately, I write for myself. Sometimes I hesitate to post things because I’m afraid they only make sense/interest me, but that shouldn’t matter.

  3. My life has gotten really busy too, and I’ve found that I can handle only posting once or twice a week. But just like you said, I find it easier to know what to say, and I have a lot I can share. Don’t feel bad. Quantity isn’t what matters. It’s the quality, and I know you have it. 🙂

    • I don’t even remember how I was able to write a post a day and have lots of pictures just from one day! Quality over quantity is definitely something I strive for in my life. Glad to hear you feel the same.

  4. There are definitely times where I struggle to find my writing voice, but I find it usually happens when I’m either writing about something I don’t care much about, or when I’m not being genuine. I blog because I really love to write, and I guess I have a lot to say 😆 I also really want to use my blog as a platform where I can reach out and help others who are going through similar issues that I went through. I just find it a great way to connect with like-minded people. There are definitely downsides to blogging, but there isn’t much in life that doesn’t have some sort of negative attached to it… it’s all about finding that balance, like you said, and figuring out what works for you. If you can’t blog daily, then don’t, and don’t beat yourself up about it. Write up a post over a few days instead of trying to get it all out at once… that way you can still write on a daily basis and feel like you’re doing something, without the pressure of actually having to post on a daily basis. Blogging should be an enjoyable hobby, and when it’s not then I think it’s time to step back and ask yourself what you don’t like about it and what you can do to make it more enjoyable.

    • It happens for me when I’m writing about things that happened days ago and have kind of lost the passion and excitement I had when it actually happened. I love the idea of writing daily but only posting every few days! That never occurred to me but it’s awesome.

      I think it’s great that you are so passionate about why you write. In my opinion, you can’t go wrong when you truly care about your writing topic and I can definitely tell that you do!

  5. Still enjoy reading your blog, sometimes less is more. Actually just forwarded your blog info to my niece, Hillary as I’m sure she will enjoy it too.

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