10 Christmas Remakes That Don’t Suck

And the award for most eloquent post title goes to!

I was just thinking about how I’ve written a Christmas music post every single year since I started blogging in 2010.  Apparently I have a lot to say about Christmas music.  And if you thought this would be the year I ran out of things to say, you’re so wrong.  Last year’s “Remakes We Didn’t Need” obviously had to be followed up by a list of remakes we do need.

1. “Run Run Rudolph” by Kelly Clarkson

I’m a closet Kelly Clarkson fan.  Hers was my very first concert, she’s the very best of all the American Idol winners (IMO) and dang, she can sing.  She kills it in “Run Run Rudolph” and I mean that in the best of ways.

2. “O Holy Night” by Lea Michelle

Okay, a more annoying Glee character never existed but girl can sing.  There’s no denying that.  It’s a well known fact that you shouldn’t even attempt “O Holy Night” unless you have some real singing chops (I’m talking to you, Leann Rimes…) and Lea Michelle does.  She fits right in with Céline Dion, Josh Groban, Mariah Carey and Johnny Mathis.

3. “This Christmas” by Chris Brown

Chris Brown sucks so bad, but I love this song.

4. “12 Days of Christmas” by Straight No Chaser

We’re probably way past the point of being shocked and delighted by this song (it did come out eight years ago), but considering how long and boring the original is, this version is a pretty amazing feat.  It’s fun, creative and includes a Christmas-ed version of Toto’s “Africa.” Yes, yes yes.

5. “Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow” by Harry Connick Jr.

Oh, did you think you were gonna make it through a Christmas song post without me talking about HCJr.?  That was silly.  His When My Heart Finds Christmas was the definition of Christmas time when I was a kid.  The Dorsey family wore that album out.  This song is particularly trumpet-y and therefore particularly amazing.

6. “Do You Hear What I Hear?” by Indina Menzel

Now comes the part where I admit that I hate “Let It Go.”  HATE.  The first time I heard it on the radio I thought it was a joke.  And now my ears start bleeding every time I’m subjected to it.  So here we have an already incredibly annoying song and the singer of an another incredibly song and you put them together and… I like it?  It doesn’t make sense!  Yet somehow, it does.

7. “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” by Sam Smith

Sam Smith could sing the phone book and I would probably buy it on iTunes.

8. “Holly Jolly Christmas” by Michael Bublé

I almost wrote “Insert Song Here” by Michael Bublé. Look, some people’s voices are just made for Christmas music.  And those people are HCJr., Josh Groban and Michael Bublé so really I could’ve written any of his Christmas songs and it would’ve worked.

9. “Jingle Bell Rock” by Hall & Oates

Would you expect anything less from someone who played “You Make My Dreams Come True” during their wedding recessional?  This version of JBR is such a classic to me, that I almost forgot it’s not the original.  All in favor of pretending this is the one and only version of “Jingle Bell Rock” to exist, say aye!

10. “Happy Xmas (War Is Over)” by Céline Dion

Normally, I would be opposed to remakes of anything by John Lennon (RIP), but this version is so lovely and well-done that it gets a pass.  It almost doesn’t even sound like the same song so we can escape the comparison trap.  And really, Céline can do no wrong with that voice of hers.

photo

What are you guys doing this weekend?  Last minute shopping?  Watching Christmas movies?  Checking the weather forecast every half hour to make sure snow is still expected on Christmas?  I’ll be doing all of thee above plus a million other things that I probably don’t have time for 🙂

Happy Friday!

 

10 Christmas Re-Makes We Didn’t Need

While brainstorming (aloud, of course) a Christmas song post idea last week, I came up with “10 Christmas Re-Makes We Didn’t Need.”  To which Joey responded “But that’s like every Christmas song.”  Wrong.  Just plain wrong.  Because A) “Holly Jolly Christmas” is an original collaboration between Burl Ives and Santa and B) Some Christmas re-makes we absolutely need.  Like the Chris Brown version of “This Christmas” and any re-make Harry Connick Jr. wants to make because he is King of Christmas Music.

These are the re-makes that don’t fit in that category.

1. Santa Baby by Madonna

I used to like Madonna.  Then I saw her in concert.  And then I had to listen to this terrible joke of a re-make 239857394 times every year.  Now there is absolutely no Madonna love in my heart.  This song is like a slap in the face of Eartha Kitt’s perfect original version and I won’t stand for it.

Madonna

2. Last Christmas by Taylor Swift

She just had to re-make this one, didn’t she?  Because she has to ruin all things good in this world.  Taylor, award shows are my life.  Can you please not be dancing stupidly in the audience at all of them?  Anyways, this song is all about being unjustly jaded and that totally ties in with her life story so I can’t say I’m surprised.

Taylor Swift

3. Happy Xmas by Maroon 5

If you think it is ridiculous that Adam Levine was named “Sexiest Man of the Year” and that all Maroon 5 songs sound the exact same, we are probably soul mates.  As a music consumer, I’m offended that they keep putting out that crap but not nearly as offended as I am that they re-made John Lennon’s “Happy Xmas.”  This should be a punishable offense.

Maroon 5

 

4. Little Saint Nick by She & Him

Aka Zoey Deschanel and whoever “Him” is.  Their music totally freaks me out.  It’s creepy and weird and I do not like it.  The Beach Boys version is totally one of my favorites and for some reason, I’m always really amused when they talk about the little Saint Nick (what does that even mean?!) but this creepy re-make does not do the song justice.

She & Him

5. God Rest Ye Marry Gentlemen by the Barenaked Ladies & Sarah McLachlan

This song will be on every list I make of bad Christmas songs.  I cannot stand it!!!!!!!!  I actually think this song is horrible in all renditions, but I did hear a nice instrumental version yesterday and decided that was the only way I’d ever like to hear this song again.

Barenaked Ladies

6. O Holy Night by LeAnn Rimes

It’s a well-known fact that you should not attempt this song if you don’t have the vocal chops to pull it off.  Which is why we have versions of this song by Mariah, Celine, Josh, Rachel (as in Berry) and Johnny Mathis, which might be the best version of all because you know he recorded that back before auto-tune was all the rage.  LeAnn doesn’t quite pull it off.

LeAnn Rimes

7. Auld Lang Syne by James Taylor

I want to like James Taylor so bad, but I just can’t do it and this re-make seriously makes me want to fall asleep.  I guess it could be worse.  It could sound like that atrocious version that plays during the first Sex and the City movie.  Remember that scene?  Truly terrible.

James Taylor

8. We Need a Little Christmas by the Muppets

As if the original wasn’t bad enough.

The Muppets

9. I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus by the Cheetah Girls

I had a real nostalgic moment when this song popped up on iPhone radio the other day.  I totally remember watching the Cheetah Girls movie a million times on the Disney Channel.  Anyways, hearing Michael Jackson sing this is acceptable because he was an actual little kid when the Jackson 5 recorded it.  Hearing 3 grown girls singing it is just wrong.

Cheetah Girls

10. Blue Christmas by Sheryl Crow

I think my hatred for this song is a mixture between not liking Sheryl Crow and having to do a lame lyrical performance to this song for a holiday recital when I was younger.  It’s physically impossible to still like a song after you’ve listened to it a billion times for a dance class.  And how dare Cheryl try to compete with Elvis on this one!

Sheryl Crow

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What Christmas re-makes do you hate?